22
Aug 2014
Josie Bungert

Face your fear Friday: Why I killed this series

Sometimes people do series/posts that have themes and then abruptly end them without any explanation. I am not one of those people.

In fact, it kind of drives me nuts when people do that (even though I’m sure this series had few loyal viewers).

So I figured I would take the time to explain to you all why I let “Face your fear Friday,” also known as “Josie writes about her irrational fears in the hopes that it cures them.”

That second title is exactly why I started this series in the first place. For writers, sometimes writing is the only way to solidify a goal, capture a true feeling, or commit to change. I was hoping, in my English and journalism heart of hearts, that this would happen for this series. I hoped that in writing about what really terrified me and saying that I will try my darndest to get past the fear online, that I really would IRL. And in that, this series was a selfish venture, because I didn’t really expect people to read it. It was more for myself, so that I would really be challenged to face my fears head on, with the backing of the 2 to 5 people that read it.

Well, it failed. My attempt at diving into the root of my greatest fears only lead to entertainment for my readers as they imagined me sitting at a parade surrounded by clowns/attempting to kill a spider/learning how to ride a plane like a normal human & chill in small spaces. And it also lead to people just seeing my inner crazy, which most friends (and some semi-strangers) don’t need to see. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t really mind that I was the butt of the joke in these situations since as a blogger I do strive to be funny and strive to make light of a rough/scary situation.

But what I do mind is wasting my own time and not admitting to be defeated even by my own out there writing. I did hope this series would encourage me to grow up and out of these things that terrify me, but it didn’t. And that’s okay, because being a writer isn’t entirely about what you end up with in the end, it’s about the journey it took to get you there. Well, on this journey, I did successfully:

– address my fears, which is the first step (I’m guessing?),

– entertain a few friends who told me these posts made their Friday (lol you need to get out and experience the world more dear friends),

– learn that reaching a goal takes more than self-perseverance and writing a tell-all post for the world to see – it takes true commitment outside the time at the keyboard,

– accomplish my first real series on my blog,

and

– realize that even though I am a writer which defines me as a human most days, I cannot cure all about myself with words and a few jokes.

So, adios “Face your fear Friday.” You taught me much, but I think I will keep my future posts (and thoughts) about my fears (including but not limited to: the fear of vomiting, the number “666,” and technology) to myself.

 

Got any suggestions for a new blog series I could try? Tweet at me, @jlbungert